Rich White and the Power Rangers
by the most hairy lee
Summary: In loving memory of a great man
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: We do not claim ownership of the Power Rangers nor of anything else real (i.e. Cardiff) or fictional… er… but not made up by us, in this fic. We do however claim the 'bossy local' and the 'crazy one' as these are true representations of the authors' identities. A/N we dedicate this to the loving memory of a great man we never met… still he entertained us greatly. I bet it isn't difficult to guess who it is once you've read the fic. 

Rich White walked in the pouring rain, the streams of water ran off his striped umbrella as he made his way to his car. Smiling he knew he'd made a difference today; all those old women who watched his show would be glad that the man from Stafford could only make 3 letter words as it would make them feel smart. Taking down his umbrella he got into his severely dented ford focus and began to drive home, whistling along with the radio as he drove.The song was old, but then again he wasn't exactly young anymore; just a little past his 60th year. Making a little mental note to include an anecdote about this song on tomorrows programme, he turned the radio up. Distracted by his slight head banging he didn't see a yellow-garbed woman go past on a yellow bicycle. Little did he know this was the most important thing he would see today, or rather would have seen, had he noticed her. Still, as I said, he did not. Instead he continued with his drive home; whistling contently to old music, blissfully unaware of the unexpected path his life was about to follow.****

Parking in front of his house, he got out and locked his car, still whistling the song, whichalthough long finished on the radio, was now lodged firmly in his brain. Glancing toward the heavens and muttering something obscene about the 'bloody awful' weather, as British people are prone to do, he noticed a flash in the sky. 'Lightning' he thought glumly. Unknowing of the evil presence surrounding the weather, he walked to his front door and slotted his key into the lock and entered his home.

Someone on the other side of the world wasn't quite as clueless though, this was something they'd been dreading for a long time.

Several hours earlier Zordon had begun to gather the power rangers in the usual fashion, and ignoring the insane panicking robot running about doing nothing useful and yelling 'ayiyiyiyiy' as loudly as his little metal voice box would allow. He pondered at the curious timing; the rangers had just defeated Rita Repulsa and were looking forward to some rest and a chance to catch up with their schoolwork, and this happens. Perhaps the universe had something against them, this was curious. Even more curious was that despite the fact that they miss so much school saving the world, they are surprisingly intelligent. Concluding that these inexplicable phenomenons are because when dealing with teenagers nothing is ever simple, the inter-dimensional being dismissed them.****Watching the beams of light appear in his secret base, zordon muttered curses under his breath, as the power rangers materalized.

"What is it Zordon?" asked Trini, who always seemed the most concerned by this type of thing.

"Yeah," muttered Jason, "I thought we'd defeated Rita and her cronies!"

"Don't tell me she's back?" asked Kim worriedly

"Nah you defeated her good and proper, this is a more evil and destructive threat that has appeared" zordon replied in his usual tone.

"There's someone worse than Rita?" asked a disbelieving Kimberly, much like she did in the show when Zordon announced the arrival of Lord Zedd.

"Yes there is" replied the head in a jar, silently thinking they should of figured that there is always something worse than the previous one. For if there was not, what would be the point in the more powerful weapons and zords that he had been saving, they could have just used them against Rita and defeated her months ago.****But since zordon has acute memory loss, he forgets this chain of thought thus allowing us to continue with our story.

"An evil force has been growing sometime, in the United Kingdom," continued the being, on a completely different note, "it is unknown how powerful it has become, but I must warn you to be careful."

"So how do we stop it?" asked Zach

"You can not do it alone," replied their mentor, " there is a prophesized one whose help you must seek."

"Who is it?"

"I do not know," replied Zordon embarrassed, "all I can tell you is that the great evil will already have sought him out. So find her and he will not be far away."

"Okay!" said the red ranger excitedly.

"But Zordon," protested Billy, "surely the likelihood of our being fortunate enough to discover the whereabouts of said prophesized one would be significantly increased if we were currently on the same continent?"

"Eh?" asked Zach highly confused

The other rangers looked on extremely confused at Billy, until finally Trini translated

" He said, 'wouldn't this be easier if we were in England?'" she said rather irritably, feeling that her only role was translating the blue rangers techno babble.

"Well we are going to send you there" zordon replied rather snappily, since he thought that was obvious.

"When do we go?" questioned Zach as they all disappeared in brightly coloured lights.

Landing firmly in the middle of a field, in what appeared to be a rainstorm, he discovered himself to be alone. 'Well I guess that answers that question' he thought to himself, 'but where are the others?'

Trini appeared in the center of Bristol by accident; looking around her, she saw a black cab and ran at it.

"Taxi!" she yells, as it pulled to a stop. Opening the door she asked, "could you tell me where I am?"

"Mmm ya in Bristol you crazy dressed lady" says the overly old taxi driver, "now do you want a taxi or what?"

Realizing that not only does she not know where she wants to go, but also that she has only American money, she replied "no," and walked off, away from the confused mutterings of the taxi driver which, as much in Britain does, quickly changed to complaints about the weather.

Billy appeared in Cardiff in the middle of the national holiday. 'It is apparent that my personage had become separated from my ranger counterparts,' thought Billy, quickly followed by 'oh no!' as a young boy next to him pointed and yelled, "You appeared out of thin air!"

"Its a trick" said Billy to throw off the young child's attention from him so he can figure out where he is.

"A trick?" asked the child disbelieving, "if it's a trick why aren't you part of the parade?"

"They said I wasn't good enough," responded Billy trying to sound upset. 

" Yeah I believe ya" replied the young boy, stuck out his tongue at Billy and ran off to watch the parade.

"Well that was sufficiently simple," muttered the blue ranger, wondering whether to use his wrist communicator to find the others.

He was worried for a moment that someone would hear his conversation, but since this never happened in Angel grove no matter how many people were about he dismissed it.

However in Angel Grove no one had ever seen him teleport either, but this had happened with in seconds of landing in Britain, so he probably should have been a little more cautious with what he said and did.

Looking around himself, he saw that he was in some sort of alleyway that opened into a main street, in which a huge parade was going past with floats. 'So this is the parade that small boy was talking about,' concluded the blue ranger sensibly, for although he talked in ridiculous techno babble, he thought normally as this is easier to write.

Realizing that the alley was the perfect place to use his communicator unnoticed, at least now that that little boy was gone; he spoke into his watch.

"Zordon can you hear me?" Billy said into his communicator.

There was no response, "Jason?" he asked a little worried, "Trini?"... "Zach? Are you there? Kim? Tommy?"He was beginning to get worried now, where were the others? Was being separated part of the plan? Sure it made sense, you know cover more ground, but Zordon hadn't mentioned it: what if something had gone wrong?

While wondering on the possibility that the evil force separated them so it could destroy them more easily, he wandered out into the main street, where the parade was coming to an end causing the ground to be littered in rubbish and bits that fell off the floats.Amongst this rubbish, for in England this is what they call trash, were a number of posters advertising the parade. Billy found himself drawn to one of them, which read; "Cardiff Festival- special guest star TV's Cath Vaderman (we know she's not Welsh but she's famous and liked by grannies so please come along). Picking up the strange poster he folded it and pocketed it to examine it later, and began to walk towards the city center, passing the train station that could of taken him to where he needed to be.

Not that of course he knew where he needed to be, he was just walking about hoping that, purely by chance, he would run into one of the other rangers. The city centre seemed the logical place to look, especially if Kim was anywhere nearby. Walking along a thought hit him, 'I wonder how I'm gonna explain this disappearance to my dad...' Dismissing this he thought, rather hopefully, that he probably wouldn't be in Cardiff for long.

When he reached the city center the sight confused him. It didn't look like the American city-centers that are lined with malls; this city center had a huge elegant fountain and the city hall beyond an ornate plaza. Of course there were shops as well, but mostly they were shops he'd never heard of, " TJ Hughes?" he asked a little confused.Taking a seat by the fountain, he decided to wait here a while in case one of the other Rangers showed up.

Jason appeared in Liverpool completely unaware of where he had landed. Surprisingly Tommy was with him, so if the plan really was to separate the rangers to make them easy targets it wasn't well carried out since the strongest two rangers landed in the same place.

"What shall we do now?" asked Tommy

"We should find out where the other rangers are," replied Jason who began to look around the empty side street.Talking into his communicator, the red ranger was surprised when no one responded.

"Well that didn't work," he said with a confused look on his face, "you got any ideas bro?"****

"Nah I don't, bro. I wonder where the others ended up..." replied Tommy

Jason was suddenly overcome with an urge to head towards Cardiff city centre, despite having no idea where he was or where Cardiff was. He dismissed it quickly, since; being the strong silent type he wasn't much for intuition. Tommy was distracted wondering where his girlfriend had landed and if she was ok.****

"There is no time to be wondering where the others are, we must find the chosen one!" exclaimed Jason in exasperation.

"But what if the great evil has them?" protested the green ranger.

"We must find the others!" responded Jason decisivelyfollowing it quickly with, "and then find the chosen one!"

"But what if we've been separated so as to do the job more quickly?"

"Must you pick flaws in all my plans?"

A pink beam of light shot out of the sky and speared the ground next to a great oak tree. As the beam disappeared Kim was left standing in; a small fenced area by a church.

"Whoa," said the pink ranger, "where am I?"

"You're in Burntwood miss-ey," said a deranged local.

"Why are you talking like a 1950's farmer?" asked the local's companion angrily, "and you wonder why we get no tourists!" Turning to the pink Ranger she spoke again, "so you're the pink ranger?"

"How did you know that I'm the pink ranger?" asked Kim

"Firstly," said the bossy English girl, "you appeared out of thin air in a stream of pink light."

"Aye," agreed the crazy one

"And secondly," she continued, "we're from the future, the year 2005, but for some reason my friend here thinks the best way to be inconspicuous about this is to talk like a character from heartbeat"

"Nay," contributed her friend, "heartbeat be set in the 60's!

"What?" shrieked the girl, " so you are an aging see captain now?"

"Yay of course, ya silly wee lassy"

"So your from the future?" asked the pink ranger, "how did you get here?"

"A time machine you foolish pink wearing fool," said the bossy local girl proving her lack of vocabulary.

"Oh," said the ranger thoroughly annoyed with these strangers.

"Hmm," said the English girl, "perhaps we should be getting back

"Aye" agreed the other

"How are you going to do that?" asked the bemused ranger.

"Watch!" replied the sea captain/ farmer. And suddenly with a flash of coloured light looking suspiciously like the power rangers teleportation the locals disappeared back to their own time

"How odd..."said Kim and walked out of the small fenced area and went in search of the others.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: how Trini got her bike.

The palace on the moon was just as she remembered it from her days here; badly decorated. Rita really had no taste, concluded the dark creature as she skulked around her old home, 'ah well, it was better than nothing.'

Meanwhile:

Rich White sat down in an old armchair with a cup of hot chocolate and began to watch the news on T.V. It was some pointless human-interest story about a woman who came back to England after 30 years of living in Australia to see her old house. He dismissed it and turned over the channels. Another news report about people seeing strange beams of light around the country interested him for a while. After a short time however, the story became less interesting; as a balding scientist came on screen and explained in an extremely complicated way that these flashes were just rare forms of lightening. It wasn't that Rich had anything against boring old men; in fact many of his closest friends were both old and uninteresting, nor did he have anything against scientific explanations; he just felt anecdotes were far more useful and informative.  
A strange woman dressed in yellow on a yellow bike, rode past his window, pretty odd rich white thought. At this time of night he didn't think there would be any cyclists Particularly ones without headlights, and in this weather, ("bloody English weather" muttered Rich) surely that wasn't safe. Torn between going outside in the pouring rain (bloody English weather) to see if she was all right and letting her ride past to use in an anecdote tomorrow his conscience got the better of him.  
Putting on his coat, he unlatched his door and stepped into the pouring rain looking about for the yellow woman, he spotted her easily enough mending a puncher on her bike, moaning about the rain.  
Noticing her American accent he was suddenly offended, only English people had the right to complain about the English weather, (ruddy English weather). He half considered marching straight back into the house and leaving her to her problems. But no, he was outside now, soaked through, (bloody rain, it's supposed to be summer!) so he might as well go help out. "Do you need any help?" he asked cautiously.  
"It's you!" she responded. Rich wasn't surprised, this happened a lot and he duly expected the next sentence out of her mouth to be, "my grandma loves you," but it wasn't. "We need your help," came the lady's voice, " can we go somewhere and talk"  
"Mmm yeah" Rich white said, startled by the lack of similarity between the people who knew him and this young yellow clothed American. What could she possibly need his help with? Maybe she wanted him to do some charity work, or promote a product; but that should all come through his agent. Showing her into his house, he had to admit he was curious, even if it came to nothing this story would entertain the guests on tomorrows show. Sitting down in his armchair, looking at the woman and gesturing her to sit as well.  
"So why do you need my help?" he ask her offering a biscuit to her Waiting for her response, he muttered a little curse at the fact his hot chocolate was now cold.  
"This may all sound a little unbelievable," began the stranger, "but we need your help to save the world"  
Oh god," complained Rich, "you're from save the whales again aren't you. I've already attended 3 fund raisers for you this month"  
"Actually," responded the woman, a little surprised, "I am a member of 'save the whales' but that's not why I'm here." Sighing in frustration, she continued, "Perhaps it would be better if I started from the beginning. Tell me; what do you know about the Power Rangers"  
"Its some folk band I think, isn't it?" Rich white said confused, he wasn't all that knowledgeable about Americans culture.  
"No, no" said Trini exasperatedly. She began to explain the ways and the virtues of the power rangers and what they fought for.  
"Oh, you mean THE Power Rangers; I'm sure there is also a band called power rangers, maybe it's a tribute act...Of course I've heard of the power Rangers; they saved the world but what do they have to do with me, or you for that matter"  
"You were destined to help fight a great evil, that would consume the world in chaos and depression," said Trini gravely "And you're the pink ranger I suppose?" asked Rich sarcastically; he didn't need this kind of hassle.  
"Look lady," he said more calmly, "I don't know what kind of joke this is, if Noel Edmunds is about to jump out of my wardrobe with a gotcha award, or not but I really don't want to be a part of "Noel Edmunds?" asked Trini confused, they obviously didn't get the house party in the states (lucky beggars), "what exactly do you think is going on here"  
"Some kind of scam to get a number of aging 'celebrities' to wear spandex?" he guessed vaguely.  
"No, no: no spandex" unless you wanted to Trini thought. " You're said to help defeat a great evil"  
"You're serious aren't you?" asked Rich, his brow creasing, "you really do think you're a power ranger"  
"I am a power Ranger" she said forcibly, " My name is Trini Kwan and I am the yellow ranger"  
"Oh really?" said rich white sitting back in his armchair looking questionably at Trini. "Have you any proof to back up your statement"  
"No," admitted the ranger shyly, "the great evil seems to have knocked out my powers, that's why I arrived by bike; in the pouring rain"  
"Bloody English weather," responded Rich appropriately So how can I believe what your saying the miss, if you have no proof to back your story" continued Rich "I was rather hoping you'd trust me," replied the teen, "I mean that's what happens in Angel Grove when I say anything. How many times my parents fell for the 'I'm over at Kimberly's' story when I was saving the world, I don't know"  
"Well sorry, but here in England we are much more cynical, i see it as a side effect of Noels house party"  
Trini felt her mind drifting off as Rich began complaining about this curious sounding TV show, catching only the odd word such as; "living fear of a Gotcha"  
"Lets say I did trust you, what am I meant to do against this great evil you talked about"  
"Not a clue" responded Trini to Rich's disbelief "This really isn't getting us anywhere is it?" he responded "Not really" she responded again, but only because responding is fun.  
She shook her head, "no," she argued, "I'll start in Bristol."

"When I got there it was raining heavily" she said "Bloody weather" Rich said automatically.  
"Quite, Anyway when I got there the others weren't there"  
"Wait there is more of you" Rich White said in disbelief.  
"Yes there are 6 of us"  
"And you go around fighting evil"  
"Haven't we been through this?" asked Trini patiently, "we established, yes we save the world, and no we are not a folk band"  
He nodded appreciatively; glad she'd cleared that up.  
"So I was on my own in the middle of a foreign country. Realizing I didn't have any chance of finding the others I decided continuing the mission was the best course of action. Determined to find you and bring you Zordon so he could explain the situation I found meditating, (which is incidentally quite difficult in a thunder storm) helpful. So I stole a bike and rode where my inner eye told me, knowing it would lead me to you. Sadly my inner eye was a bit wonky and I crashed into a few lampposts on the way"  
Rich White nodded helplessly, wondering why everything had to be so complicated and confusing. 'It was as if', he thought, 'two very inexperienced and highly deranged story tellers had taken control of his life'  
"So after a while I went past your house and got a puncture, must have been fate," concluded Trini, looking at the blank face of Rich White and wondering if he was at all following her plausible statement. "You must see that without you the world is doomed!" she said loudly making Rich White jump out of his state of confusion.  
He raised an eyebrow at her and she slumped in her seat, "you still think I'm crazy don't you"  
He nodded slowly adding, "I also think you should return that bike"  
"But I can't remember where I took it from" she said exasperatedly "Is there anyway I could convince you?" she looked hopefully at him shaking his head.  
"Well I better go find the others, they can't be that far off" she stood up and made her way to the front door.  
Walking outside, she was pleased to find the rain had eased up a little. Leaving the bike where it was, flat tire and all she decided to follow her inner eye again. I mean it had steered her right before, presuming of course that rich white was the chosen one. Which, obviously she couldn't do because she had no idea what the chosen one looked like, or where she was meant to find them.  
Why had she thought he was the one?  
Pondering this, she started to walk up the street wondering if the rain would stop soon as her clothes were starting to get damp again. Aimlessly watching people driving on the wrong side of the road she tried to find a place where she could try and use her communicator again, it didn't work last time, but she wasn't about to give up hope After it failed once more to work the way it should, the yellow ranger began punching keys randomly as she gave up all sense of hope of making it do anything, and so of finding her friends and saving the universe. Wondering whether she should go back and try to convince Rich again, because despite lack of any evidence she did wholeheartedly believe him to be the chosen one.  
She was overcome by a sudden urge to visit Cardiff Sadly not knowing where Cardiff she went into newsagents and picked up A-Z map and began shifting through it, the shopkeeper looking like he wanted too throw her outside for not buying the map.  
After a few minutes she found Cardiff, she replaced the map and ran out into the street, the rain had stopped now but the clouds were still heavy in the sky.

Happy that she now knew where she wanted to go, she was angry at herself for being so stupid as to not look up where she actually was, although on further consideration she decided Rich White's post office was not likely to be marked on the map.  
Stumped at what she could do she remembered that British post offices act as a free bureau de change, at least for euros. Of course since this was 1994 euros didn't exist, so we'll assume they did the same for dollars.  
Looking around for a post office, since the shop she visited early was unhelpfully only a newsagents she spotted one next to it. Walking in she changed her $37.45 into sterling and went back into the newsagents to buy that A-Z as well as some card and a pen.  
Writing CARDIFF clearly and largely on the card she stood on the side of the road waiting to be picked up by the next passing serial killer.  
Sadly it wasn't a serial killer, Rich White still thinking about the yellow clad woman in the rain decided to go and find and question her some more. As the rained eased up, he saw her holding up a hitch hikers sign saying "Cardiff" pondering this he pulled over to ask her.  
Climbing into the passengers seat before checking who it was, the yellow Ranger was surprised to see Rich white.  
Meanwhile in Cardiff, Billy had also remembered that the post office changed money, why this was such a well known fact in the small American community of Angel Grove I don't know, its just another of life's little mysteries like, where socks in the washing machine go, and why, dear god why, Noel Edmunds exists.  
He, Billy that is, was sitting eating an ice cream, waiting for the others to show up. Billy sat there, continuing to eat his ice when 2 people walked up to him, smiling madly. Billy stared at the grinning locals, worrying what they might do "Yarr," said one loudly, "look bossy local... who not be in her local place of localness: it's the blue ranger and he has an ice cream"  
"Aye that he does...have an ice cream. Though he should finish it instead of staring us like were mad!" said the bossy local!  
She paused a moment before adding, "gah! Damn you! You've got me talking like a pirate now. I've spent far too much time with you since we met the pink ranger"  
"Im sorry ye lassy, I don't know why I'm talking like a pirate" said the crazy local, looking bewildered.  
"Who are you people and what did you say about the pink ranger? How do you know her?" said Billy standing up, forgetting his ice cream.  
"Who we are is not your concern," replied the bossy local in an attempt at mysticism, "but we will tell you that we met the pink Ranger almost a year ago in Burntwood... ah 2005"  
"A YEAR AGO, I just saw her 2 days ago, but your saying that's a year?" said Billy sitting down again in shock and returning to his ice cream "Hmm," mused the bossy local, "and he is what the Americans class as a genius"  
"That he be!" agreed the crazy one "Firstly I think it was more like an hour ago that you saw Kimberly," said the bossy one irritably," and secondly did you miss my wistful sigh of 2005. As far as you are concerned its 1995 yes"  
"Its 2005!...that means Kim got here in 2004...why would zordon take such time sending us here. Have you seen the others"  
"My GOD man!" exclaimed the bossy one, "we're time travelers! It's not that difficult a concept to grasp!" She paused momentarily, "Sorry about that, I just get a little over worked sometimes. No Kimberly is the only one we've seen since although we can travel through time, we always land in the same place we just left. So we could only visit her since she landed in our local park and you since we were in Cardiff for a University open day"  
"So you can go back and tell her where I am, can you not? Or take me with you"  
"Aye we could, but it would be difficult since it will probably end up being the same conversation and all, time being the evil wench she is," said the crazy one "Plus it'd probably involve a 6 hour drive from Cardiff to Burntwood in the year 2006 before we can travel back and meet her, and we really can't have you out of your own time period for that long. Not to mention I've still got to tour the university grounds. Still we'll see if we can pass the message on to her that your here"  
"But it's been a year, how do you know she is in the same place"  
"It's been a year for us! It's been about 3 minutes for you. That's the beauty of time travel, now we must go: or we'll miss the bus to look at the university accommodation"  
And with that they disappeared Billy stared at the space, which had contained the crazy and bossy locals seconds ago.  
Billy then wondered where was this Burntwood? 'Ah well,' he thought and continued to eat his ice cream.

Meanwhile, in the middle of Liverpool Jason found his communicator was working.  
Jason spoke into his communicator "Is anyone out there? Can anyone read me"  
Static buzzed through the speaker. Passers-by didn't seem to notice the noise and carried on.  
"Jason?" came a fuzzy voice through the static, "It's Zordon: a disruption interrupted you teleportation. Have all the Rangers landed safely"  
"I don't know, only Tommy landed with me. We don't know where the others are. What happened zordon"  
"I do not know," replied Zordon, "it is imperative that you find the other Rangers and the chosen one. Good luck"  
"Gee" said Tommy, "how helpful"  
"Gee?" asked Jason, "isn't your catchphrase: aww man"  
"Shut up," snapped the green Ranger, "I haven't heard you say 'Back to action today"  
"Never mind our catchphrases, we must find the other rangers. If only we had some help"  
"I think we must find the chosen one first, the other rangers will gather to him I'm sure of it"  
"Ok," agreed the Red Ranger, "But first i think we need some English money: I hear the post office now changes currency" 


End file.
